A bride-to-be has revealed her ‘oddly competitive’ mother plans to wear a white, floor-length gown to her wedding, claiming it’s her ‘last chance’ to feel beautiful.
Taking to Reddit, the anonymous bride, 23, believed to be from the US, revealed she’s had a ‘rocky relationship’ with her mother for years- but things took a bizarrely competitive turn once she got engaged.
She explained: ‘Since I got engaged, she’s been oddly competitive, commenting on my body, comparing our rings, like we are in a competition, saying things like ‘this day is as much about me as it is about you.’
However things reached breaking point when her mother unveiled her gown for the big day-a white dress that looked ‘exactly like a wedding gown.’
The bride explained: ‘I honestly thought she was joking until she showed me the dress she bought, a white, floor length gown that looks exactly like a bridal dress. And I I told her, flat out, she cannot wear that.’
She was stunned when her mother ‘burst into tears’ and didn’t understand why she could not wear the white gown on her big day.
She added: ‘She got quiet, then burst into tears, saying ‘this was an opportunity to feel beautiful before getting old’ and that I’m selfish for not letting her have this one thing.’
Trying to keep the peace, the bride says she offered to take her mother shopping for a more elegant alternative, only to be accused of being ‘controlling and ungrateful.’
Now, her mother is threatening ‘not to attend the wedding at all’, and extended family members are piling on pressure for the bride to cave.
One aunt even insisted that she should ‘just let her have this’ to avoid drama on the big day.
Fortunately, the bride says her fiancé and maid of honour are backing her up, but she’s been left questioning whether she’s in the wrong for standing her ground.
She concluded: ‘I don’t think I’m wrong for drawing a line here, but now part of me wonders if AITA?’
Many rushed to the comments, and called the bride’s mother ‘extremely manipulative’, with some saying she should uninvite her to the wedding.
One person said: ‘Your mother is extremely manipulative. Take her up on that offer. NTA’
Another wrote: ‘This the best response. OP, stop engaging with her tantrums. “Mom, you cannot wear white, you will not be allowed in if you show up in a white dress + people will secretly mock you for it. We’ll miss you if you can’t make it.”
‘Then disengage from the convo, go low info with her on the rest of your wedding plans.’
Someone else said: ‘I was going to say, wearing white to her daughter’s wedding is not her opportunity to feel beautiful. It’s her opportunity to become a laughingstock in an incident that will be gossiped about for decades.’
A fourth added: ‘You felt like she was competing with you. That is because she is in a toxic competition with you. Reset your boundaries. “Mom,you can either wear something mother of the bride, appropriate, or stay home. Please take a good look at your behavior. If you want a celebration of you have one at a later date.” (An anniversary, perhaps.)’
Meanwhile, others said if they saw someone wearing white to a wedding they ‘accidentally’ spill red wine on them.
One person said: ‘Might as well not let her ruin your wedding before cutting her off. Let her know if she wears a white dress there’s usually multiple women that will spill their red wine on her and that you’ll also have the photographer photoshop it into a dishwater grey.’
Another said: ‘As a red wine drinker, I was on patrol at my best friend’s wedding. Ready to make a mess if need be but everyone was cool so it worked out.
‘I will gladly do this for op* if she wants; I’m a very clumsy person.’
Someone else added: ‘Such a nice dress, it’d be a shame if something happened to it. MOH, that’s your cue!
