Feeling ‘big’ emotions can cause problems for children and their parents alike but an expert is here to tell you fun and games can help with regulation.
Louise Pettifer says storytelling, symbolic and imaginative play provides kids with a ‘fundamental platform’ to explore their emotions. “As children develop, they draw on play to understand themselves, others and the world around them,” the Wellbeing and Play expert at Connetix, the magnetic tiles construction toy, explained.
The play guru says a key way to begin building children’s emotional literacy is identifying their own and others’ feelings. “Naming the emotion and labelling the physical experience associated can significantly reduce the emotional intensity,” she said. “For example: ‘When my heart is racing, my stomach is churning and my palms are sweaty, I feel nervous’.
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“A brilliant way to remember this concept is ‘name it to tame it’. This approach helps children to recognise and understand their emotions rather than suppress them or be seen as something that is discouraged. When all emotions are OK, children are more likely to express themselves in healthy ways, meaning they are less likely to be overwhelmed, and have a greater sense of control over their behaviour.”
Here are Louise’s six tips to boost emotional intelligence through play…
Vocabulary
Place a spotlight on emotions and boost emotional vocabulary during play. This could sound like: ‘I can see you can’t find the puzzle piece you’re looking for right now, that can be so frustrating.’
Role-play
Role-play is a powerful learning tool for children. Providing opportunities to play-out everyday scenarios like cooking, playing shops and resolving conflict, helps children to navigate social experiences, plus build communication skills and empathy towards others.
Be in the know
Use play to prepare children for difficult times or transitions, like going to the doctor or starting a new school. Having a script and a visual tool helps children to better understand and self-manage during these challenging situations.
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Take age-appropriate risks
Allow children to take age-appropriate risks during play. From learning to first ride a bike to zooming down a hill, these moments of challenges and testing limits are all part of navigating life’s ups and downs, which helps to foster resilience, self-esteem and confidence in their own abilities.
Collaboration
Provide opportunities for team building and collaborative play. This might look like setting up a shop or designing and building a castle together, children learn valuable skills such as teamwork, communication, cooperation and problem-solving in both fun and natural ways.
Be a spectator
Where possible, give children the space to resolve conflict themselves without jumping in too quickly. This might mean spectating what’s happening in the scenario, for example: ‘I see you both want to play with the lion at the same time, I wonder what you could do so that it works out for you both?’
