In 2007 I was preparing to move from Brisbane to the UK. I was 21, I’d just finished university and my family had been through a rough period. It was time for a new adventure, even if I was mildly anxious about leaving behind all my loved ones. When my best friend, Tegan, suggested a night out, it sounded exactly what I needed, but first she wanted to show me around her new lodgings on Enoggera army base.
Tegan had told me stories about the other soldiers she was living with, but there was one guy who kept coming up – an artillery officer named “Gorgeous”. Obviously, he had another name, but when Tegan introduced us, his nickname made a whole lot of sense. He was still in his cams (hello!) and despite never being interested in men in uniform before, my curiosity was piqued.
We shared a cab into town and it became apparent that Gorgeous was easy to talk to, didn’t hoard his smiles and liked to (kindly) tease his friends. Tick, tick, tick. After a few drinks and lots of flirting, we ended the night with several kisses.
A few nights later, Gorgeous asked me to dinner. Soon it became clear I wasn’t the only one with travel plans. While mine consisted of picking up casual jobs and making enough money to explore Europe for as long as I could, in a few months Gorgeous was deploying to Afghanistan. Even though whatever we might be starting came with a time limit, we began seeing each other multiple times a week. It didn’t take me long to realise how much I liked him but I pushed those feelings aside because I had a plan – and catching feelings was not part of it.
When Gorgeous asked if I’d like to go to Melbourne as his date to a fancy formal dinner for his unit, I said yes even though I knew it was a bad idea; I was already in too deep. After picking me up at the airport (he’d flown down a few days earlier), Gorgeous told me he had news: his deployment had been postponed and now he wouldn’t be leaving until the end of the year.
I was so relieved and at the same time devastated because he would remain in a place where I could be, yet my departure was only two weeks away. It felt impossible to keep denying what we had become to each other and how far we’d strayed from keeping things casual. I then met his parents, and his aunt and grandmother who were visiting from England. He showed me where he’d grown up and then we drove to Puckapunyal, an army training base, for the Regimental Dining In.
Once the dinner was finished and we were back in his room in the barracks, I couldn’t contain my feelings any longer. Through tears, I confessed I didn’t know how I was supposed to leave him. And Gorgeous responded just like I could’ve predicted: calmly and gently. He held me as we talked everything through. I’d spent so long telling everyone it was time for me to have an adventure overseas that I’d almost ignored the adventure right in front of me. It didn’t matter that we hadn’t been together long. I didn’t want to go. So I didn’t.
We’ve now been married for 16 years and have two beautiful children, and three of the best dogs have been part of our family. Gorgeous did eventually go to Afghanistan – twice, in fact – but we were able to meet up in Japan on his ROCL (relief out-of-country leave) during his first deployment. We spent two weeks skiing, visiting Disneyland and exploring Tokyo, Kyoto and Shiga Kogen. Since then, we’ve travelled together to the United States, the UK, Europe, New Zealand, Samoa and Fiji.
Our story is by far the best adventure I’ve been on and I can’t wait to see what happens next.
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Emma Mugglestone is the author of In the Long Run (Penguin Random House Australia; $22.99), out 12 August
