RONNIE O’SULLIVAN has just 15 days to find a cue for the World Snooker Championship.
The Rocket, 49, has still not discovered one he likes after snapping his favourite in a fit of rage in January.
And the seven-time world champion does not know whether he will miss this month’s Crucible showpiece for the first time in his glittering career after battling “snooker depression”.
In an exclusive SunSport interview, O’Sullivan — who has pulled out of five tournaments since that cue drama — admitted: “I literally don’t have a cue.
“I still haven’t found one that I’m comfortable with.
“Still just trying out different ones. Trying to find one that I like. I have probably changed my cue four, five times.
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“On two or three occasions, I found one straightaway.
“On the other two occasions, it has taken me sometimes a year to find one.”
Two broken halves of the cue were tossed in a bin at the behind-closed-doors Championship League after he unexpectedly lost 3-2 to Chris Wakelin and then quit the event.
And it would have stayed there had loyal pal Robbie not fished it out for safe keeping.
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O’Sullivan laughed: “Unrepairable. It’s a bit of memorabilia now. It’ll be getting sold off.
“I do regret it, really. Because it was my cue. It’s hard to find another one.
“What happened was just coming. I have done it before. And it’s not the game — it’s me really.
“I have just been struggling for so long now. I just couldn’t do it anymore, to be honest with you. I couldn’t.
“And I’m still struggling now, to be honest.
“I literally have had enough of playing what I call unacceptable snooker.”
Since that incident, O’Sullivan, who turns 50 this year, has pulled out of the Masters, German Masters, Welsh Open and World Grand Prix, citing “medical grounds”.
In February, it took him “nine hours” to drive 260 miles from Essex to Llandudno for the Welsh Open.
But despite checking into a hotel, he did not feel ready and then drove back home without playing.
During the hiatus, he admits he has been “scared” to approach a practice table and he only resumed training sessions in mid-March after a couple of holidays.
Now he is up to 15 hours per week and that workload will increase once he is back from a quick trip to his snooker academy in Saudi Arabian capital Riyadh.
The decision to appear at the Crucible hinges on THREE “sparring sessions” on April 14-15-16 — just days before the competition starts in Sheffield on April 19.
Essentially, he wants to be competitive and will not travel up the M1 if his game is unworkable.
O’Sullivan, who has played in the past 32 World Championships, said: “I’ll make a decision when I feel like I’m ready to make a decision. That will be it.
“I know I have nothing to prove. But I was getting to the point where I was scared to even go near a table.
“Not even the match table, just a practice table. And that has been going on for a long time.
“I tried to play through it. I just tried and I tried and I tried. I was getting no enjoyment out of it.
“Even that season when I won five tournaments, it was just hard. I couldn’t keep going on struggling.
“At some point you’ve got to try and enjoy the game. I can only enjoy it if I’m playing half decent.
“I’ll make a decision after those three good sparring sessions that I have arranged.
“Until then, I will be working as hard as I can to try and figure out the problem.”
Away from the table, it has been a tough time with reports that he has split from his long-term partner Laila Rouass, the Holby City actress.
But O’Sullivan insists: “Everything’s fine. The private life is good. It’s just with the snooker.”
“Listen, that’s why I snapped my cue, I just couldn’t take it any more.
Ronnie O’Sullivan
It is more his technique, rather than any mental health issues, that is the reason he has been shunning the competitive circuit since the New Year.
Even his running has taken a back step because he has lacked the motivation to lace up his trainers.
O’Sullivan, the world No 4, continued: “It got to the point where I was struggling with the game. I always call it snooker depression. Call it stage fright.
“Call it whatever you like. It starts to affect you mentally.
“Listen, that’s why I snapped my cue, I just couldn’t take it any more. I don’t want to put myself in a situation where I feel like that could happen again. I need to find the love for the game, to find that passion.
“I’m not bothered about winning and losing. I never have been.
“I’ve always been more, ‘Where’s my game at?’ If my game is all right, then cool. If it’s terrible, I can leave that for one, two, three, four months.
“But I can’t live for three, four years of struggling and just grinding it out. It was just no fun, to be honest with you. I’m trying to unravel it.
“If you’d asked me the question, do you think I’ll ever get to a point where I feel comfortable enough to go and play?
“Well, the answer two days ago would have been probably ‘maybe’. If you ask me today, after the last two practice sessions, I’d say absolutely not.
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“But I’m not going to quit. I definitely won’t quit.”
